Friday 25 June 2010
Thursday 24 June 2010
Bare time, Bare legs
Wow. Ok, it's been a while since I've written on here, my reason being that the past month has been a mish mash of exams, a trip to France and summer vacation induced laziness. But do not fret, I am back with avengence - and with a particularly robust examination on both our best friends and worst enemies - our legs.
Displaying bare legs is usually an easy way to inject a bit of glamour to a look (when executed with a hint of ladylike poise of course) the determiner really of how good you look when showing off your pins is, in the infamous words of our fairy gokmother Gok Wan, that it's all about the confidence. Cringey. But true.
There's not much to aid us in showing off our legs in all their tightless glory, but it's when we cover them up that I begin to adopt some rules. Bare your midriff, live in your trackies, wear a watch on your ankle, really, dress how you want. But when it comes to leggings, that's when I start becoming a pretty massive judgmental snob. I warn you now, Ima go all preachy on you. I really am. I've even made some commandments - that's how strongly I feel about these special spandex creations.
Leggings for me are reminiscent of a time when you would've found me learning to tie my shoelaces, watching Power Rangers in the morning and pretending to be a princess in the living room. About six years old. I sadly don't indulge in such activities anymore. (Ok, maybe the last one). So I was quite amused when I noticed their formidable return to fashion and finding their new home to be in the women's section. I've never worn them because I don't think they'd look quite right on me, but you know what, they actually look quite good. Weren't expecting that were you? BUT (and I stress this but), you have to wear them right, otherwise you will have me rolling my eyes and growling like a terrier behind you.
LIKE YOU KELLY ROWLAND!
Ok, she doesn't look too bad. But I do think she could've improved vastly on this outfit. It may just be me with my mind in the gutter, but the first thought that popped up in my mind when viewing this photo was CROTCH.
Anybody else? If her top had just been an inch longer, she wouldn't be appearing on this page. It's just that tiny bit too short and unfortunately creates a tiny camel toe effect, not what you want to associate with a beauty like Miss Kelly. Perusing the rails in H&M the other day, I overheard a mother say to her teenage daughter: 'No Rachel, you can't wear that top with leggings, you need a long top.' This made me so ridiculously happy I actually wanted to go high five this supermum. Yes Rachel, do you really want to be drawing attention to your lady bits to the crazy public of Derby? I seriously hope not. I formed a discussion on lookbook to see what the fashion savvy had to say about it and the overwhelming response was 'I'd rather not see it.'
So, the first commandment of leggings is:
Some of you may be saying, but it's not like she's actually going about exposing herself, leggings keep you covered. To me, leggings are almost like tights. It would be improper if a girl was going about in tights wearing a top that didn't cover up her bum, right?
Now I'm going to contradict myself. You can get away with attiring yourself in leggings and a short top. What?! Yes. I didn't think it at first, but then I saw it with my own eyes when a few fashionable Leeds girls were sauntering about in town. I actually wish I'd stopped them now for a photo to put up on here. But here's the thing, their leggings were of good quality, thick, well fitting and completely opaque. That's the kind you want if you're gonna wear a short top. The next box to tick is to make sure your top dangles no lower than the top of your hip bones. Even go for a crop top if you're feeling brave. This will avoid that undesirable camel toe effect and will proportionalize your body, so you don't have to be dealing with any of those unholy stares. Unfortunately for some, this look will be more successfully pulled off by those of you of a slimmer physique. I am afraid for bigger girls, this may end up exhibiting your fuller body in an unflattering way, so it's best to keep to the longer tops.
2. Thou shalt purchase leggings of a modest cloth when wearing shorter tops.
3. Thou shalt adorn yourself with a top no lower than the hip bone when wearing leggings.
Kelly Rowland is a bit of a serial culprit when it comes to leggings...
She's got a winning smile and an enviable body - but something just doesn't look right here. Yes, it's those damn leggings. She's got killer legs and she really isn't doing them any justice here. Sometimes a trend will not suit you. Chinos look ludacris on me. Tulip skirts make my hips look even bigger. My point is, just because everyone else may seem to be wearing something, doesn't mean you have to follow. Find out what suits you and what doesn't. Simple as.
4. Thou shalt not mindlessly follow fashion and the masses.
Two more to go. And this one's an easy one: make sure you're wearing the right underwear. Wear a thong if you can endure them or get down to Marks and Spencer and buy some seamless briefs. VPL is never a good look. Especially with something so clingy as spandex.
5. Thou shalt not be an advocate of the visible pant line.
Time for the final rule. What's it gonna be? I'll tell you now, it's a personal preference. If you can pull off this look, I salute you and would very much like to see it.
6. Thou shalt never wear yellow leggings. You look like a chicken.
Congratulations go to those of you who had the patience to read all that. But leggings truly are a tickly cough of a nuisance for me. Sad, I know.
Right, time to quit my jibber jabber.
Displaying bare legs is usually an easy way to inject a bit of glamour to a look (when executed with a hint of ladylike poise of course) the determiner really of how good you look when showing off your pins is, in the infamous words of our fairy gokmother Gok Wan, that it's all about the confidence. Cringey. But true.
There's not much to aid us in showing off our legs in all their tightless glory, but it's when we cover them up that I begin to adopt some rules. Bare your midriff, live in your trackies, wear a watch on your ankle, really, dress how you want. But when it comes to leggings, that's when I start becoming a pretty massive judgmental snob. I warn you now, Ima go all preachy on you. I really am. I've even made some commandments - that's how strongly I feel about these special spandex creations.
Leggings for me are reminiscent of a time when you would've found me learning to tie my shoelaces, watching Power Rangers in the morning and pretending to be a princess in the living room. About six years old. I sadly don't indulge in such activities anymore. (Ok, maybe the last one). So I was quite amused when I noticed their formidable return to fashion and finding their new home to be in the women's section. I've never worn them because I don't think they'd look quite right on me, but you know what, they actually look quite good. Weren't expecting that were you? BUT (and I stress this but), you have to wear them right, otherwise you will have me rolling my eyes and growling like a terrier behind you.
LIKE YOU KELLY ROWLAND!
Ok, she doesn't look too bad. But I do think she could've improved vastly on this outfit. It may just be me with my mind in the gutter, but the first thought that popped up in my mind when viewing this photo was CROTCH.
Anybody else? If her top had just been an inch longer, she wouldn't be appearing on this page. It's just that tiny bit too short and unfortunately creates a tiny camel toe effect, not what you want to associate with a beauty like Miss Kelly. Perusing the rails in H&M the other day, I overheard a mother say to her teenage daughter: 'No Rachel, you can't wear that top with leggings, you need a long top.' This made me so ridiculously happy I actually wanted to go high five this supermum. Yes Rachel, do you really want to be drawing attention to your lady bits to the crazy public of Derby? I seriously hope not. I formed a discussion on lookbook to see what the fashion savvy had to say about it and the overwhelming response was 'I'd rather not see it.'
So, the first commandment of leggings is:
- Thou shalt wear a top that covers your behind to banish unholy stares to the crotch area.
Some of you may be saying, but it's not like she's actually going about exposing herself, leggings keep you covered. To me, leggings are almost like tights. It would be improper if a girl was going about in tights wearing a top that didn't cover up her bum, right?
Now I'm going to contradict myself. You can get away with attiring yourself in leggings and a short top. What?! Yes. I didn't think it at first, but then I saw it with my own eyes when a few fashionable Leeds girls were sauntering about in town. I actually wish I'd stopped them now for a photo to put up on here. But here's the thing, their leggings were of good quality, thick, well fitting and completely opaque. That's the kind you want if you're gonna wear a short top. The next box to tick is to make sure your top dangles no lower than the top of your hip bones. Even go for a crop top if you're feeling brave. This will avoid that undesirable camel toe effect and will proportionalize your body, so you don't have to be dealing with any of those unholy stares. Unfortunately for some, this look will be more successfully pulled off by those of you of a slimmer physique. I am afraid for bigger girls, this may end up exhibiting your fuller body in an unflattering way, so it's best to keep to the longer tops.
2. Thou shalt purchase leggings of a modest cloth when wearing shorter tops.
3. Thou shalt adorn yourself with a top no lower than the hip bone when wearing leggings.
Kelly Rowland is a bit of a serial culprit when it comes to leggings...
She's got a winning smile and an enviable body - but something just doesn't look right here. Yes, it's those damn leggings. She's got killer legs and she really isn't doing them any justice here. Sometimes a trend will not suit you. Chinos look ludacris on me. Tulip skirts make my hips look even bigger. My point is, just because everyone else may seem to be wearing something, doesn't mean you have to follow. Find out what suits you and what doesn't. Simple as.
4. Thou shalt not mindlessly follow fashion and the masses.
Two more to go. And this one's an easy one: make sure you're wearing the right underwear. Wear a thong if you can endure them or get down to Marks and Spencer and buy some seamless briefs. VPL is never a good look. Especially with something so clingy as spandex.
5. Thou shalt not be an advocate of the visible pant line.
Time for the final rule. What's it gonna be? I'll tell you now, it's a personal preference. If you can pull off this look, I salute you and would very much like to see it.
6. Thou shalt never wear yellow leggings. You look like a chicken.
Congratulations go to those of you who had the patience to read all that. But leggings truly are a tickly cough of a nuisance for me. Sad, I know.
Right, time to quit my jibber jabber.
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